God, Please Tell Me What to Do with Patty Magid
At 37, Patty Magid discovered two things: she was pregnant and she had a lump in her breast.
Overcome with concern for her husband, her children and the baby she carried, Patty prayed to God to tell her what to do.
As she drove by her church in Jersey, God revealed the answer.
Patty faithfully obeyed and for 9 months did not know if her baby would be survive—or if cancer would take her from her older daughters and husband.
Learn the miracle Patty discovered when she delivered her youngest daughter on December 22, 1999.
And discover how to make Easter decisions--choices that are made in tiny moments but have an eternal impact.
Transcript:
Lindy Wynne (00:01.672)
Welcome to Mama's in Spirit, a podcast pointing you towards God in everything you are and everything you do. I'm Lindy Wynne and it's a blessing to be with you. Hello everyone. Welcome to this Easter gathering, this time for us to come together for this mini retreat, to take pause in the hope set wherever each one of us are right now, that by the grace of God, our hearts are opened.
so that God can touch them. The divine physician can heal them and move in all the ways that we most need to become closer to the one who loves us most. And we are so blessed to be here for this Easter podcast with Patty Magid. Patty, thank you for joining us.
Patty Magid (00:50.223)
You're welcome, Lindy I'm so happy to be here.
Lindy Wynne (00:53.194)
You are a joy to be with. You have such a vibrant dynamic spirit about you and your love of God is palpable.
Patty Magid (01:03.384)
Thank you. It's a work in progress. And the more I do it, the more I feel it. before I share my story with you, I'd like to pray with you, if that's OK.
Lindy Wynne (01:15.094)
Yes, thank you, Patty.
Patty Magid (01:17.304)
So everyone, let's just quiet our hearts and thank Christ and his mother for bringing us here together so that we can talk about life and all the goodness that God gives us right here on the earth and in this beautiful state of Tennessee. I'm a new convert here. I'm from New York and I love it here.
and my heart is filled and i would love to share my story with all of you today for this Easter
Lindy Wynne (01:53.306)
Amen. Thank you, Patty. Patty, we're going to pause for one sec. Can you take your microphone and just pull it a little bit away from your mouth? Just straight away back up here. Go like this. Don't worry, I can take this out so easily and put it right here.
Patty Magid (01:59.214)
Is that better?
Patty Magid (02:09.614)
Right here.
Lindy Wynne (02:11.048)
Yeah, try that. Just talk to me for a second. Yes, I can hear you. I'm just trying to make sure.
Patty Magid (02:14.03)
Can you hear me? OK. OK. Do you want to do it again?
Lindy Wynne (02:20.445)
Yeah, yes, yes. Pull it even a little bit just straight away. Straight, no, no, not towards. No, the other way. No, the other way. Farther away. There. Now talk, that's, okay, let go of it. Try talking.
Patty Magid (02:25.386)
this way. forward. This way.
Patty Magid (02:35.446)
Okay, Lindy, can you hear me? Okay.
Lindy Wynne (02:38.463)
I can. Okay, yes. Okay, can you pray again? And can you start in the name of the Father, Son, Holy Spirit, so then they know that we're starting prayer. was your prayer is beautiful. Your heart is beautiful. I don't want your whole podcast to pop. That's why I had you pull that away. So okay.
Patty Magid (02:42.23)
Okay.
Okay. Okay.
Patty Magid (02:53.506)
Okay, gotcha, okay. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, amen. Christ and Mary, his mother, his beautiful mother, thank you for bringing Lindy and I together so that I can share my story with all of you on this beautiful podcast during this Easter season.
Lindy Wynne (03:00.808)
Amen.
Patty Magid (03:19.68)
my heart is just filled with joy and with the opportunities being shown to me to make a difference and to help others during this season of Lent and this eventual season of joy when Christ is resurrected on Easter. So with that,
Please bless us, dear Lord, as we begin this podcast. And please make me Lindsay's good speaker for today. In the of the Father, and of Son, and of the Holy Spirit, amen.
Lindy Wynne (03:52.51)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (03:57.77)
Thank you so much for that beautiful prayer, Patty. And I love how you kind of told me like here, let's begin in prayer. I feel like you could have your own podcast, Patty. You're like ready to go.
Patty Magid (04:05.966)
I don't know. I don't think so, but thank you. One of these days.
Lindy Wynne (04:13.015)
I love when people come on and they are so much themselves and so free and so in love with God. So praise God. And in that spirit, will you please start at the beginning of your story?
Patty Magid (04:24.974)
So I'm from New York and it was 1999 and I was at a conference in California and I discovered that I might have breast cancer. And so as soon as I got home to New York, I continued the conference in California and I was worried the whole time, praying, God, what does this mean?
And I got home and it was cancer. And so we scheduled my mastectomy and I found my doctor and, you know, the rest is history. So that was April. And I was scheduled for the operation in July. And I started to feel awful, just sick, tired, couldn't wake up in the morning.
And I don't know what made me do it, but I took a pregnancy test. I was 47. I didn't think I could be pregnant. But I thought, this is what I feel like. And sure enough, all the tests turned whatever color they were supposed to turn, and I was very pregnant. So what do you do? You're pregnant. You're 47. And all of the good advice started pouring in, right? Oh, won't have an abortion.
you wouldn't have the baby now, right? You have two grown children. And I just sat there and I just let it all bombard me and I was so confused and every night I cried and I prayed. And finally I went to my doctor and I said, I don't know what to do. And he said, well, let's find out how pregnant you are. So I went alone for my ultrasound and it had been a while. My daughter was, my youngest is 12. I had two children. One was 19, one was 12.
Lindy Wynne (05:42.838)
.
Patty Magid (06:09.326)
And so it had been a while since I had seen an ultrasound and I'm telling you, they're a lot better in 1999 than they were in the eighties. And I could see her. I knew it was a girl. She was beautiful. I bonded with her and I knew she was perfect. And she...
Patty Magid (06:30.508)
I knew she needed me. So I was 13 weeks pregnant. So I left the ultrasound and I was driving home by myself and I went through my little town in New Jersey and it's very lovely with shops and restaurants and I passed my church and it had just stopped raining and I was praying and I was crying at the same time. And the sun was starting to come through the trees as I passed the church and I remember saying
Please, God, please tell me what to do. I didn't know what to do. I just didn't know how to handle this. I didn't know if I was going to die. I didn't know what stage my cancer was. didn't know. All I knew was that I had a baby that I had to protect. And as I passed the church, the sun came through the trees on the street, and the beams hit my hands on the steering wheel.
And I got an electric shock in both arms and I was still. I was just filled with this feeling of peace and. Goodness, and I think it was the Holy Spirit. Honestly, I do. I mean, I at the time I thought I was having a reaction to something and I. I remember pulling into my driveway after that happened and.
Lindy Wynne (07:39.253)
.
Lindy Wynne (07:43.128)
you
Patty Magid (07:59.424)
My husband was playing with my 12 year old basketball on the driveway and I looked at him. said, I'm going to have a baby. And he looked at me and he said, great, we're having a baby. But I knew that God was in the car with me that day. mean, he, it was Jesus. was God the father and it was the Holy spirit. And he came through me through those, those sunbeams on my hands. And I was protected and for nine months.
I didn't know if the cancer was growing. didn't know. I had a lumpectomy. I did it under twilight. I worried every single day because I was still scared because I didn't know what was going on. And then I had her December 22, 1999. She was three and a half weeks early on purpose. And I went back into the city, into Manhattan, to my oncologist and my surgeon.
Lindy Wynne (08:38.26)
.
Patty Magid (08:59.074)
and they couldn't find the cancer. It was gone. And I knew then that I had a miracle that day. I mean, I had Christ's healing presence in my car at my lowest, deepest moment, right? It was at my core. I did not know what to do, even though I knew I didn't want to have an abortion. But then again, do I want to be, you know, the mother who left her other two children and her husband?
Lindy Wynne (09:10.507)
.
Patty Magid (09:27.662)
either to deal with no mother or a baby that, you know, there was something wrong with, or I don't know, or both of us dead and gone, or just, anyway. He made the decision for me. I mean, he actually made the decision for me. I was filled with the decision, you know, the words came out of my mouth, I'm having this baby. And, you know, she is 25 now, she is,
Lindy Wynne (09:36.436)
Okay.
Patty Magid (09:55.79)
a kindergarten teacher in Bellevue. Every child in her class loves her. They think she's a different flower every day. She's beautiful. And I'm blessed. I lost my husband in 2017. And I think that she gives me purpose because I still had to, she wasn't all cooked yet when he died. So I thought, God, you're really smart. You knew I needed something to get up for, right?
I have this beautiful, she's still my child, she's 25, to me that's still a kid. She still has to grow up a little bit and I'm still here for her. I just feel like I made the right decision that day, but it didn't come easy and it only came because I relied on God and I prayed as hard as I could and He answered me. He did. So that's my story.
That's my god moment.
Lindy Wynne (10:56.2)
Patty, thank you so much for sharing and I love how you called it your God moment because I hope that all of us listening can relate to that.
I hope we can all look into our hearts and back on our lives and see God moments. And if we can't, that we pause and that we reflect deeply to find God in our moments in life and especially in the more difficult moments in our lives. And very Trinitarian, there are three things you shared about that struck me so deeply, Patty. And one of those is the sun.
So many of you listening know that I moved from California to Tennessee. And what you may not know, and Patty, I think I mentioned this to you before, is that my family is originally from New York on my mom's side. And so I basically grew up in California with a very New York family. And I don't think I realized my cultural experience of New York until I went to college. And I just realized, my goodness, I was raised in a New York family.
Patty Magid (11:43.32)
Wow.
Lindy Wynne (11:57.404)
yet I did not grow up with seasons and I have since moved to Tennessee and you're now in Tennessee. This is God bringing us together, God's providence. And during the winter, I will go out like I never have before in my life, never, and face the sun on days that the warm sun is out because for any of you living in seasons like Lent or Lent's in our lives, they can get very long.
Patty Magid (12:04.888)
Yes.
Lindy Wynne (12:26.576)
and they can be very difficult and some people even have seasonal affective disorder. So I will go out in the sun and I will look up at the sun and I will just let the sun bask on my face. And I always think, of course it's S-U-N sun reflecting the sun, capital S-O-N. So the fact that you had that moment in your car and you talked about the sunbeams, which I thought was so beautiful.
on your hands and you just knew that was an infilling, that shock was an infilling of the Holy Spirit. And then you went home and had clarity about the second thing that really struck my heart. And the second thing is the sanctity of life and that you announced, we're having a baby. I'm having a baby. And your husband said, of course we are. We're having a baby. I have never been pregnant that I know of, Patty.
And I think one of the blessings in that, because there's blessings in most everything in life. So the blessing in that is that I really feel this deep knowing and sense of the sanctity of life. And I've raised one child from birth, our youngest, and that felt like such a profound miracle in my life to raise a child from infancy. And so the miraculousness of all of your children and your youngest is evident.
Patty Magid (13:26.35)
Mm.
Lindy Wynne (13:50.937)
It's clear. And the fact that you were faced with one of those trials that can feel unimaginable and difficult beyond imagination, because like you said, what were all the outcomes that could happen? And that has to do with our will versus God's will. And that's really the third thing is that instead of being in human will, the humans that were feeding you
Patty Magid (13:51.182)
Mm.
Patty Magid (14:12.002)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (14:20.996)
their thoughts and their opinions or even your own will. You
lived, you surrendered to God's will, yet beautifully, it was very clear to you because of that moment in the car. And so you lived through many months of ambiguity in God's will. And while you still had all your human feelings, I think of Mary's fiat, and I think of her in the
Patty Magid (14:35.288)
Mm.
Lindy Wynne (14:55.857)
stable. And when she said, no, in the Annunciation, when she said that when it says that she was disturbed, yet she said yes to the Lord. I love that. That's one of my favorite parts in Scripture, because Mary was human with a pure heart. So she had all the feels. Yet she said yes. And so you too said yes, and you still had all of the feels throughout your pregnancy. And like you said earlier,
Patty Magid (15:04.909)
Mm-hmm. Yes.
Patty Magid (15:23.148)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (15:25.036)
None of our hearts are pure like Mary's or a work in progress just like the rest of us. And so you grappled, you wrestled, I imagine during that time, yet you still said yes. And I think about the realities that you are facing like you shared. You're looking at the chance that, okay, everything could turn out well, or I could die and my husband and my older daughters will be left without a wife and a mother and possibly also with
Patty Magid (15:32.587)
Okay.
Lindy Wynne (15:54.864)
a younger sister and daughter that has unique needs and maybe extreme needs or number three, you both could have been lost. And so that's really significant. Yet you stayed in God's will and how miraculous and beautiful and providential that you have this beautiful daughter that's now 25 and I love how you said she wasn't done being cooked. She was still at home and is still being cooked when...
Patty Magid (15:59.63)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Patty Magid (16:14.86)
you
Patty Magid (16:19.075)
It's not cooked yet.
Lindy Wynne (16:25.644)
when your husband passed away. And look at that glorious outcome in God's will that you still had this precious daughter like you said to help you get up in the morning.
Patty Magid (16:28.046)
Mmm.
Patty Magid (16:37.314)
Yeah, it's a reason for living. I mean, besides that I just love, I accept it now, you know, that this is, this was his plan. You know, going through my husband being sick, I never thought in a million years I would be raising the youngest child alone, and yet I did. And probably not as good as it would have been with him here, but I did the best I could.
And I'm still every day, I'm a work in progress and I'm trying. I'm trying to be the best version of me. I'm trying to stay in his grace and give her something to model, right? To be a good person. And I know she knows because her college essay was about choice. you know, she...
She actually had to read her college essay in her public speaking course. And when I came on graduation, her English teacher came up to me and said, she knocked us out, she said, you know, because she ended it with, I was my mother's choice. And it was, you know, it was really lovely. I mean, she is a good person. And she always makes, I sometimes think like I didn't teach her this.
but she somehow picks up on kindness and compassion and making the right choice. She's a good little girl. I mean, she's 25, but she's my little girl. She always will be. And I'm amazed with her. I marvel at her. She's good teacher. She's a good person.
Lindy Wynne (18:20.747)
I love how she said, I am my mother's choice. That is profound. And I have nothing to say about that because it's so profound that I mean, it speaks for itself and points to the divine and points to the miraculous gift of life. That is just amazing. And when you talk about how she learned things and picked up things that you didn't necessarily put down, that's so beautiful for all of us to hear Patty because we can't
Patty Magid (18:26.762)
Ha ha.
Lindy Wynne (18:49.11)
We can't put down all the things. That's why we're a human family. You talked about being a work in progress and we are reliant on God, fully dependent on God and also reliant on our human family, which hopefully is also an inspiration to all of us to all be the best versions of ourselves for the Lord that we can be to hopefully reflect really the love of our blessed mother, albeit imperfectly that feminine love from purity of heart, which we constantly need.
Patty Magid (18:50.819)
No.
Patty Magid (19:08.238)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (19:18.488)
cleansing so that we can love as we're called.
Patty Magid (19:19.384)
Mm-hmm.
Patty Magid (19:24.044)
Yeah, it's true. I recall going to a parent-teacher conference by myself because he had died. So it was his senior year. And I went just because I should go, right? He went to all of them because I was busy working. And I went to this one and her physics teacher came up to me. She goes, have to tell you a story about Romi. And I'm thinking she did something crazy or, you know,
She said, first day of class, we had to pick lab partners. And she said, your daughter, she said, she's in a popular group. And she said, I could see them all lining up like getting ready. I'm going to be on your table. You're going to be on mine. Romy's on ours. And doing that little thing, Romy raised her hand and she said, I pick Anthony. Anthony was special needs. He was being mainstreamed in the physics class. Sometimes you have gifts in other fields.
Lindy Wynne (20:13.162)
Okay.
Patty Magid (20:22.87)
and he could do science and math. But he was, you know, behind social leaves, awkward. And no one would have picked him if my daughter hadn't raised her hand and picked him first. And everybody kind of looked like, you're picking Anthony to be your lab partner? And he was so happy. She said he was beaming. And you know, so Romi went over with her little, you know, her computer, her tablet, and she sat down at Anthony's table like it was no big deal.
And I didn't know she did that, but when I came home from open, I said, you didn't tell me you picked Anthony to be your lab partner. She said, my, he would have sat there. He would have been the last one to go. I wanted him to be first. I, that's a blessing too. You know, where, where does she get that wisdom?
Lindy Wynne (21:11.615)
Yes, she was living out that the last shall be first and she chose Anthony and Patty. I don't know if you know this or not, but two of our children have special needs and one of them has had an in particularly difficult time socially. And so I can imagine the profound impact on Anthony as well as all the other students that that had. And there's something coming to my heart that I believe is is hopefully the Holy Spirit is that
Patty Magid (21:22.07)
I didn't know that.
Patty Magid (21:27.426)
Yeah.
Lindy Wynne (21:41.93)
You made a tiny choice in a moment with an eternal impact when you chose to have your daughter that day, when you came home and said, I'm having a baby, we're having a baby. All these years later, albeit very different, here is Romi, your daughter in class, making a tiny decision with a very significant impact on not only the class and on Anthony, but also on the teacher.
Patty Magid (21:57.315)
Right.
Lindy Wynne (22:11.041)
than on you when the teacher shared with you and now on me and all of us here gathered as you share this with us. And that is a beautiful reminder to all of us to make tiny decisions all the time to glorify the Lord. Easter decisions, to make Easter decisions, to make decisions in hope even when we feel fear, if we feel disturbed.
Patty Magid (22:30.851)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (22:40.244)
if we feel afraid, if we feel anything, to still make the right decision. Because when we make the right decision by the grace of God and we stay on the path, our hearts can continue to pilgrimage towards Easter itself, Christ. Now we all are imperfect like we talked about and fall off the path and look other ways and have to be redirected and praise God in our faith. We have so many ways to be redirected to Christ and to get on the path.
back on the path, no matter what choices we've ever made in our life. Yet, this is a beautiful invitation, an Easter invitation for all of us to choose Christ, to choose Christ every day and in the tiny moments. And it's not as overwhelming if we just think about one moment or one day at a time.
Patty Magid (23:20.184)
Mm-hmm.
Patty Magid (23:30.958)
Random acts of kindness. They shouldn't be so random. We should almost purposely look for them every single day. How can I be kind? How can I act towards somebody else? How can I make somebody else's day better? Not their life better, their day. Just their day. Just that moment. she's just a good person.
Lindy Wynne (23:35.445)
Yes.
Patty Magid (23:58.542)
And I used to say the wrong one died. My husband was a really good person. But maybe that was Portakot's plan too. maybe this kind of opened my eyes and made me realize that I have to do more. I have to do more. have to share more about my God moments. And hopefully somebody else can make the right choice, the right decision.
and just, you know, going forward in life and Christ, you know, guiding you as opposed to you running the show. I love to run the show. I'm a big show runner. But honestly, when you sort of give up the wheel, it's really a blessed thing. And I have so many blessings since I moved to Tennessee.
Lindy Wynne (24:48.739)
Okay.
Patty Magid (24:57.142)
Some days I just said, when I first moved here, I lived in Long Island and my house faced the east. We built it that way. And so we woke up with the sun. And I always knew where the sun was because it was my house faced the sun. And Long Island is a long Island, right? And you know, the sun is there and then you can see the sun is in the back of my house at the end of the day. And when I got to Tennessee, it's, I didn't know where the sun was.
I didn't know what direction I was facing. And I realized in the beginning I was lost. And then one day I got up and I took the dog out in the dark and we went searching for the sunrise. And I'm telling you, it was so profound when I saw the sun come up. And I knew, okay, I live in this apartment building and it's all strange, but I know where the sun is. It was amazing. And my house faces the sun again.
where I am in Franklin. bought a house here and that has a big impact on me. I have to have the sun. I just have to. And I don't actually face east, face south, which means I get it all day long, which I love. A lot of people don't, but I do. I love the sun and I love to feel that beam on my body and it makes me feel good. It just makes me feel good. It centers me.
So, yeah, I'm feeling at home here. I feel like I finally found my place where I'm supposed to be. And so glad you asked me to join you today. This has been wonderful.
Lindy Wynne (26:38.908)
Well, praise God and a couple of things. One is, is that you said you like to direct the show and I could have laughed in that moment because like I told you, you almost took over the show in the beginning and I loved it. I was like, here you go, Patty. I do a lot of these and they're always a gift and blessing. It's just such a sacred responsibility. So I'm like, here, Patty, you take responsibility.
Patty Magid (27:01.528)
you
Patty Magid (27:04.876)
Yeah.
Lindy Wynne (27:07.933)
yet I love that, no I love it, it's so precious. And it reflects what you're saying is when you say like you like to direct the show, I'm sure so many of us gathered, if not all of us can relate to that and that has to do again with our own will. And yet also tying it back into the sun, we never have a plan, we just surrender these mini retreats in a podcast of the Lord and the sun has come back again as an S-U-N. And that you had this home,
Patty Magid (27:08.76)
Sorry.
Patty Magid (27:33.816)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (27:36.286)
And I imagine you had a lot of plans for this home. You built this home and you built it in a very specific way to see the sun rise. And like you said, it sat on the other side. And I imagine you did not expect to lose your husband at the age that you lost him. You already spoke of what a wonderful good man that he was and is, because love is eternal. And that is providential too.
Patty Magid (27:50.36)
Mm-hmm.
Patty Magid (27:55.958)
in it my anniversary by the way
we would have been married 45 years.
Lindy Wynne (28:03.338)
You would have been married 45 years. God bless you both, Patty. I pray that you sent him so close today and the Lord so close to you. And so here you had this home and you had these plans and even these plans with your husband. And I imagine how devastating it was to lose him. Also because you said that your daughter's still living at home and who is still young. She helped you to have a reason to get out of bed every morning by the grace of God.
And then also you ended up moving. That's a really big deal to think of how you had these plans to live on Long Island in this home. And yet you lost your husband and you end up moving to this area in Tennessee. You stayed in an apartment until you bought a home. And when you were in the apartment and you were new here, you felt lost in some ways, which I can relate to totally and completely, Patty. And I think for all of us, sometimes we feel lost in our lives.
Patty Magid (28:47.374)
Mm.
Patty Magid (28:53.998)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (28:57.679)
And what a beautiful synonymous experience that you had a metaphor that as you were feeling lost, you couldn't find the sun, the S-U-N, and you felt a little lost maybe from the big S-O-N. And so then you with your little dog went out on a search, on a search for the Lord, on a search for the sun, and you found the sun and the sun, all of it that day. Yeah, the deepest longing of
Patty Magid (29:13.25)
Mm-hmm.
Patty Magid (29:22.998)
The sun found me too.
Lindy Wynne (29:27.346)
of your heart to find the sun and to bask in the sun like you did so many years ago when the sunbeams hit your arms and your hands.
Patty Magid (29:33.358)
Mm-hmm.
Patty Magid (29:37.046)
Yeah, yeah. And it healed me. kept her safe. does. It does.
Lindy Wynne (29:41.725)
Yes, and it healed you. And it continues to heal you. Yes.
Yes, because we all always need healing. Patty, going back to the very first podcast of the season with Dr. Bob Schuetz from the JP2 Healing Center, that was the whole center of that podcast was our need lifelong for healing and that Jesus does heal and Jesus heals us by loving, by loving us and then by us choosing.
Patty Magid (30:06.798)
Mm.
Lindy Wynne (30:18.889)
to love. And so Patty, I'd love to ask you, when you lost your husband, and today's your anniversary, and for everyone listening, this was not the witness story that we were planning on talking about. But I feel deeply moved to ask you this is when you lost him, and it was hard to get out of bed. When we lose people that we love so dearly, it can be hard to still love.
Patty Magid (30:26.381)
Mm-hmm.
Lindy Wynne (30:48.208)
because we've experienced the most difficult part of loving or one of them is when we actually lose someone to death and they go home to heaven before us, hopefully and prayerfully until we're together again eternally. Patty, how did God reach to you in the most intimate of ways to help you to continue to love in His will?
Patty Magid (31:20.376)
So it was 18 months of me traveling. I traveled. I didn't want to be in the house. And then after 18 months, I was so tired. I came home and my daughters were, I have a son, the oldest is a son, and then I have the two daughters. But the two daughters were in New York and they didn't know what was going on with me because I was, I mean, I was getting up every morning and I was,
okay let's go to mexico okay let's go i just didn't want to be there did not want to be home
And it's kind of one day I just woke up and I said, I can't live this way anymore. I mean, I have to be happy again. And I started to clean out the garage, which was his retreat. He was a football coach and he used to work out there and you know, lawn stuff was there and all his tools and you know, it's a man's place. I mean, I didn't even want to be in there, but I knew I was going to sell the house in probably a year. So I started to get rid of stuff.
and I found notebooks and marble, black and white marble notebooks. And he had written stories about dying in the notebooks. And I didn't know what I thought he was writing because he was a football coach. So they write everything down, all their reps, all their, and he was very conscious of, you know, his physical body and what was he had a really bad cancer and he couldn't do a lot of things.
athletically that he used to do, but he could walk, he could do bands, he could do weights, and so he wrote down every single thing he did. And I used to annoy me. mean, I'd watch him writing, I'm like, what is he doing? He lived for five years, so I have five years worth of notebooks. But in between the reps are pearls of wisdom. It was about his death, and it was about, he didn't know how to pray.
Patty Magid (33:24.93)
He wrote that. And I read this after his death. mean, and I think about this because I think, why didn't he tell me when he was alive? But maybe I couldn't have heard him. But God made me find those books, right? And then I found one book kind of in the middle of the illness towards the end. And he wrote us letters, you know, to me, to his best friend, to his firstborn, to his middle child and to his baby. And
They're all in pencil, you know, I mean, and you know, just a couple of pages of how they should live, that they, hopes he was an example of how to die with dignity. I mean, just the stuff that, you know, but I wouldn't have found them if I didn't come home, right? And if I didn't stop running. so now I have these, these books and I have to figure out what to do with them, but they're really wonderful books.
I have different people tell me different ideas, but I mean I obviously want to save them and I don't want to fade away, but I'm thinking about doing something with them because they are inspirational. I mean they tell you that when you have bad news, you kind of sit there and you, and in his mind, know he said he didn't know how to pray, but he was praying in that book, because he said, I want to make sure that I'm...
What they see is a man who's facing death with dignity and grace. that you can die, you know, everyone has to die. And you can choose the way you die, right? You can choose whether you die screaming and hollering or crying or what. And he didn't. He got up every day. If he felt good enough, he'd go golf. He'd do nine holes. He'd come back and he rested the whole rest of the day. if he could go for a walk, he'd go for a walk.
He'd read outside in the sun. I mean, he always did something. you know, that showed my, my girl didn't even think he was dying because he didn't act like he was dying. He acted like he was living at the end of his life. Does that make sense? He, he really, it was a shock to all of us the day he died because we thought, no, no, you're going to get better. Like you always do. You're going to, know, you're going to just go up and take a nap and you're going to be better. And he wasn't.
Lindy Wynne (35:42.33)
Yes.
Patty Magid (35:55.794)
And he didn't. And he did die. And the most beautiful thing about his death, and I say this on our anniversary, is his whole family was with him. I mean, every single person in his family came out to see him. I just said, you know, I said, he's not doing good, but we're going to get him home and we're going to stabilize them and maybe do hospice at home. But, you know, if you can come out and see him, I would probably come out soon. They were all there. And I was in the...
chapel filling out, it was a Catholic hospital, filling out just permission to treat him for the weekend and because I was getting a hospital bed delivered on Monday and I was going to take him home and they said he's entered the dying phase. I go, this is a guy that was yelling at me an hour before because I wasn't fast enough, right? And I said, he's entering the dying phase? And I ran down the hallway and he was already
I call it the tunnel. He was in the tunnel between here and there. But he wasn't going. and I, I like jumped on the bed and I'm yelling at him, you don't have to stay. I said, I will take care of them. You can go. And he didn't go. And then my brother, John came up. My brother was there. Some of my family was there too. It was a beautiful death because we were all together. And he said, I think he's waiting for somebody. And I looked around and the only one that wasn't there was.
Lindy Wynne (37:00.453)
you
Patty Magid (37:23.052)
Romy, my youngest. And he says, I'll go get her. He had a drive out east where she was working and bring her back. And I said, don't tell her what you're bringing her back to. And she walks in the room and she's all, ha ha, you know, she sees everybody. And then she sees him in the bed and she screams and she jumps on the bed and says, my daddy. And she, he died about 10 minutes later holding her hand. So he waited for her.
And somebody took a picture of her hand and his hand. And I didn't even know they took it, but it was on Instagram. And they said, what a beautiful way to die. That was how big. And when I saw it, when somebody showed it to me, first I was upset. And I'm not upset, but there was his hand. And he was yellowed. He had jaundiced, because it was in his liver by now and in his abdomen and the cancer.
and he was in so much pain and there's her beautiful little you know, tanned hand with her pink nail polish, her Barbie nail polish, you know and it was just, was beautiful that our baby was holding his hand when he died.
Lindy Wynne (38:35.077)
Party.
Patty Magid (38:38.688)
Another... Another blessing?
Lindy Wynne (38:41.238)
Yes, I don't know how we're gonna get through this podcast. No, don't apologize. That is.
Patty Magid (38:43.708)
I know, I know, I'm sorry.
Lindy Wynne (38:53.262)
to think about you coming home all those years earlier and saying, I'm having a baby. We're having a baby. And him saying, we're having a baby. And you not knowing if you were going to survive at that time, yet you did. And then he, your husband, your precious husband, ended up dying sooner than you would all think. And while she was still young and living at home.
Patty Magid (39:07.554)
Yeah.
Lindy Wynne (39:23.734)
and to think of her holding his hand with her little nail polish and her little sweet hand as he went home to be with our Lord. That is profoundly moving, Patty. On your anniversary.
Patty Magid (39:37.497)
It was beautiful.
Patty Magid (39:42.08)
and i never thought of that way i think it all came together it's all planned all plan
Lindy Wynne (39:50.626)
Yes, God's divine plan. God's divine plan.
Patty Magid (39:53.454)
Yes.
Lindy Wynne (39:57.24)
more beautiful than we could ever dream up. Yet sometimes we kick and scream because it's hard or just because ambiguity is so hard.
Patty Magid (40:01.645)
I know.
Patty Magid (40:07.118)
Right.
Patty Magid (40:10.478)
Like, why are you doing this to me? It's not doing anything, it's life. And sometimes life gets hard, right? And we have to, I mean, everybody dies. I mean, that's what I, I think because we've had so much death in our family, my husband had a gene in his whole family, except his father died of cancer. His sister is the remaining sibling. I went to so many funerals, young funerals, I mean, in their 40s and 50s.
And I didn't think my husband had the gene, and he did. And that's when we realized it was a gene when he got sick because he was so healthy.
And Romy was actually tested last week, and please pray for her. I mean, it is what it is. If she has the gene, she has the gene, and we'll pray and we'll deal with it. We'll do what we have to do. My other two don't have it. And I don't have it. not, obviously it came from his family. But it's frightening because it's out of your control. You...
They're getting better with cancer and genetics and things like that. But at the end of the day, we all have to die sometime, right? That's just, we're human. We have a date, right? And we never know when the date is. I just, you know, since he died, I've really kind of marveled at my life, how blessed it is.
I never did before. spent many years saying, you know, my house isn't big enough. My car isn't good enough. You know, I was always discontent and I had to make more money and I had to do this and I had to do that. And I have now entered into a space. I'm so like I said, I am so blessed to be here. I'm still working, right? I'm still, I'm still doing the same thing, but I'm doing it differently. I'm doing it in his name and for his
Patty Magid (42:17.39)
I open my heart and I'm not looking at things anymore. I'm looking at impacts and small acts of kindness and helping somebody and being somebody's friend. It's a different perspective and it's not one that I had my whole, I'm ashamed to say, it's recent. But isn't it great that I woke up, that I saw the light?
I mean, it's really, it's really a marvel. you know, kind of all started with Romy with that profound, oh my God, I'm pregnant and I have cancer and what am I going to do? You know, there was no question what I was going to do. I'm just going to have her, right? And there was obviously a question, but in the end, there was no, the only answer was I'm having a baby, right? And it might not have turned out the way it did. It might've been, and I would've dealt with that too.
Because God gives us the strength to get through every trial. And sometimes I think maybe my husband met me because he knew I would be a good advocate for him when he was sick. I mean, I was a force to be reckoned with. I that man's insurance, I mean, they denied us all the time and then I got the operation for him. I mean, I was just like, I was a warrior. But sometimes I just forgot how to be soft.
you know, I, because I was so busy finding people and doctors and insurance companies, Medicare, I mean, all the big ugly's and, but I know how to do that. I know how to fight the system and, but it's exhausting. And, you know, I didn't want to do it, but I did. He needed me to, right? That was what, so I think sometimes, did he marry me? Because he knew someday, you know, did God put us together because I could be there for him and be.
you know his his warrior because it's i don't know how people do it navigate this from the system and you know
Patty Magid (44:25.902)
I'm not afraid. I will fight. You know, I won't my mouth and say no, no, you're gonna pay for it and you know Anyway, It you know, it was a bad experience, but it it helped me grow in Christ, you know to open my heart it really did and
I don't think it's coincidence that I moved to Tennessee. There's a church on every corner and the first time somebody grabbed my hand and prayed before we ate, I'm like, I'm not in New York anymore. This is not normal. It was just, and I think now how wonderful it is that we say thank you before we eat. It's such a wonderful thing. I mean, but you forget about it in you know, fast paced New York. No, you don't see that. You don't see people blessing themselves and.
holding hands and saying grace. It's too fast paced and it's kind of socially awkward. I mean, really, took me a whole year to get used to it. It really did. And now I love it. I love it. It's great. But it's just like, it's like I came from an alien country. We don't do this in Kansas. It's just like, where am I? But it's a wonderful place and this community, Franklin Brentwood is
I I met the bishop. He's wonderful. I mean, I can't even believe I met a bishop and he's, you know, he's great. You have a great bishop. I used to always yell at bad hours in New York. I, you know, because I did, I did. was, I was in New York or I was angry all the time. And, know, and this guy's, he's, he's wonderful. And I don't know the priest. I haven't met one priest that I don't like.
You know, think St. Philip is blessed. They have beautiful priests and I mean the message and St. Matthews. I mean, I discovered St. Matthews last Saturday. What a great little church out in the middle of nowhere, but beautiful, you know, and it's not by coincidence, right? This is just part of my Christian journey now that I'm here. It's just, this is all part of it and I accept it.
Patty Magid (46:43.598)
You know, every day I wake up and I think, all right, what's on the agenda today? What the heck is gonna happen to me today? But it's great. It's really a great life. And you know, I say sometimes I have, what do I have, 20 years left? I turned 72 on March 10th. And I think, I mean, if I have 20 years, how lucky am I, right? 20 blessed years, right? To do good things. So anyway.
Lindy Wynne (47:09.057)
Yes, praise God. Patty, you have such a beautiful Easter spirit and Easter heart about you. You are an Easter woman and I love that so much. And you used a word that just keeps reverberating in my heart. Marvel. It's a marvel. And so you talked about New York and people being angry and not everybody's angry in New York, everybody. And I know we have New Yorkers on here.
Patty Magid (47:32.352)
no no
Lindy Wynne (47:34.984)
And like I said, I come from a family of New Yorkers and my family, much of them also now live in Rhode Island, which is such a delight to go visit. Yet I think that, like we talked about earlier, Patty, it's so easy to focus on the things that are hard and it takes a greater intention and pause and a greater stillness, oftentimes to really look at the blessings. And what I'm hearing from you is that you notice and you recognize
the blessings deep in your soul and ultimately the blessing of Christ, the blessing of the Son. And that has changed and transformed you and continues to happen every single day. So that is also a beautiful invitation from this podcast for us to focus on our blessings. And that is why we have seven Easter podcasts, seven mini retreats and a podcast for Easter, because we do that for Lent. And Easter is that long in our faith tradition, in our Catholic faith.
And sometimes I wonder if we know that. And so it's so important that we celebrate Easter, that we celebrate the gift of Christ, the gift of the Son. So, Patty, I cannot thank you enough for sharing. This has been just a glorious, glorious mini retreat in a podcast thanks to your testimony. And Patty, before we close, there anything else you'd like to share?
Patty Magid (49:02.19)
I'd like to pray with you again, if I may.
Lindy Wynne (49:05.159)
You take it over, girl.
Patty Magid (49:06.638)
Okay, well thank you for bringing Lindy and I together today and for having this beautiful podcast and I'd like to say the Hail Mary because Mary is Christ Mother and I owe her a lot because she guides me every single day. Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
Thank you, Lindy. I so enjoyed this. This was great. Wonderful way to, you know, get over hump day, right? Is this a hump day, Wednesday?
Lindy Wynne (49:44.831)
We are recording on a Wednesday everybody. That is awesome. Thank you so much, Patty. God is a God of surprises and you have just delighted and surprised my heart today with this glorious sharing of really Easter. Easter in your life, Easter in our lives, Christ in our lives, the Son in our lives.
So everyone, you can go to mamasinspirit.com or wherever you like to listen to podcasts. We're also on YouTube. Please subscribe. And actually, I don't ask this very often, but it would be really wonderful and a great Easter gift to me and hopefully to our Catholic community and beyond if you will go to Mamas in Spirit and like it, review it.
leave positive feedback there if this has touched your heart and touched your life so that hopefully it reaches more people. This is a ministry that's it's it's only a ministry and just really trying to be surrendered in the will of God. And know you can reach out to me and our blessed chaplain Father John Meyer for prayers or intentions whenever you'd like. And also just so you know back in Lent Father John and I recorded a mini retreat in a podcast about this really
about being in the will of God and going to God because you talked Patty about after your husband passed away for a year and a half kind of running around and avoiding facing what had unfolded in your life. But yet look at that Easter blessing when you went into the garage and you found all of these notebooks that were really prayers and messages.
wisdom from the Lord, from your husband, which is just a great reflection of an Easter gift after your husband's passing. So thank you so much, everyone, holding you always in heart and prayer. Can't wait to be together again next time. This is Lindy Wynne with Mamas in Spirit. May God bless you and yours always.